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Pride parade group?
bad things are about to happen
squeakyspooky wrote in asexuality
Last year I attended Pittsburgh's pride parade- the first I've ever been to, and it was awesome- and while I'm not too surprised by it, I noticed there was no asexual group in the parade. But looking at the Pittsburgh Pride website, I noticed that there's a little online registration thing where you can enter yourself or a group into the parade as a walking contingent. This caused a little idea to pop into my head of trying to create an Asexual group to walk in the parade this year- or if not this year, then at least at some point!

However, I don't know if it's really that easy- can you really just gather a bunch of people together under a specific name and be a part of the parade? Do you need to be represented by an appropriate organization(such as AVEN or other asexual awareness organizations)? Most walking groups have banners to announce who they are- do you need one? How do you get one made? Are those expensive? How do you go about actually organizing something like this?

So many questions, haha. And now I have two more: Has anyone here ever done something like this before, or know someone who has organized or participated in walking groups for pride parades who could answer the above questions/give advice? And if something like this became a real possibility for Pittsburgh Pride and began to be planned, are there any asexy Pittsburghers who would come and be a part of it?

eep!

I am in the Pittsburgh area...but I have lots of mixed feelings about participating so publicly in an event like this. Hmm! (Partly, I am one of those grayish asexuals and get squeamish about presenting myself as being part of an identity marker that I may at some point not belong to fully then becoming chastised for hypocrisy. If that makes any sense.) I am, however, very supportive of the notion of becoming more visible, which may mean my personal squeamishness about privacy/judgment could take a back seat for the greater good of the community.

I'll be your LJ friend? And happy to help figure out the networking stuff?


It does make sense! I have mixed feelings about going so public with something like this too, just because I've always been on the meeker side of things, hehehe... but yet I thought of this. There is apparently some deeply masochistic part of myself that enjoys conflict and feeling unsettled and anxiety-ridden. xD

I have a feeling this is an idea that will go down in flames, so the help side of things will be on-hold indefinitely for now xD But if you'd like to be friends, sure! Unfortunately I'm more active on Dreamwidth than here(if you're over there too though, I'd be happy to add you that way too), but I'll add you nonetheless!

Oh my, and there go the flames. ;) Oh well! I am on dreamwidth, too, with the same handle -- but got overwhelmed (it happens easily) and have not kept up my cross-posting.

this is a really bad idea for multiple reasons, please consider focusing your efforts elsewhere.

Would you like to share why you consider this to be a bad idea? I knew there was a high possibility of getting a lot of negative responses, but I wanted to see what people would say for either case.

The whole reason I thought of this was because I knew other cities had asexual contingents in their pride parades- its more unusual than not, but its happened. I've heard nothing but good things from the people who were involved at those events, and it just seemed like a very positive thing that groups of people were out there showing their pride to be who they were while also drawing awareness to asexuality at the same time. Obviously it might not work out so perfectly in every case, but so far the reception to asexuals being in the pride marches has been very positive, and thus the idea to try to make it work in my own city came about.

while i understand the desire for asexual representation, pride is absolutely not the place to do it and the reality is that those other asexual groups in pride are present in spite of everything that says they shouldn't be.

as a lesbian woman (and someone who is exploring an asexual identity), i would be incredibly disheartened to find asexual groups participating because they'd be there by virtue of a conceited erasure, and willful overlooking, of queer history especially re: the compulsory desexualization of gay people. that is an issue we haven't really moved past yet.

please just organize community-wide group activities on your own.

if you continually exclude aces from pride events because you're 'just not ready yet', you're never going to BE ready.

it isn't about not being ready, it's about ace representation not being something pride needs or should want.

And of course you speak for the entire pride community and spectrum of orientations, yes?

why can't the ace community make their own pride events instead of trying to force their way into ours

queer/lgbtq spaces are not a catch-all for anything having to do with sexuality. after what our community did to build up these spaces for ourselves, it's necessary to allow us to keep it for us, instead of demanding that we allow aro and straight aces in

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drag and leather and feminism have been pretty intimately connected with the queer scene for decades - especially leather, which at its inception was exclusively gay men, basic lgbt history 101. you can't really extract leather culture, drag, and feminism from the lgbt community's history.

hypersexualization is a facet of desexualization: queer sexuality is only acceptable when it's in specific spaces, at which point those animalistic bastards are getting it on all the time, and addressing that is what pride is about. tying together sexuality and personhood to a public that used to force us into lethal and traumatizing procedures like shock therapy and corrective rape, in order for us to humanize ourselves is really important. asexuality doesn't really have a history this and there is definitely a movement to co-opt it that leaves a sour taste in my mouth, especially given the strange new trend of trying to push "nonsexual love" on people who don't want it.

(no subject) (Anonymous) Expand
I'm a Bisexual Asexual. I was under the impression the Pride parades were about being proud of your sexual identity. Asexuals aren't allowed?

Where exactly does it say that asexuals shouldn't be present, by the way? I'd love to know. The history of compulsory desexualisation of gay people is in no way threatened by the presence of people who identify as asexual. True, Asexuality is not a choice, neither is homosexuality, and there is more in common between the two then there are differences. At a time when Asexuality itself is under attack as a recognised sexual orientation, I would thing that the LGBT community would be supportive. I wouldn't go to a Pride Parade if I thought that your views were represented by the LGBT community, because to me it would be like going to an antiracism rally, but only for black people, asians and native americans not included, because they don't understand the plight of the slaves being taken from Africa.

Pride, to me, isn't just for Lesbians, Gays, Bi's and Transgenders, it's for all those that don't fit into the mainstream Hetero catagory, and are Proud of it!

Edited at 2013-01-17 02:35 am (UTC)

the idea that pride isn't just for oppressed classes renders the idea of a community a little pointless - straight people attend (and often participate in spite of lgbt people's wishes) because straight people, especially straight people who consider themselves not part of the "mainstream" for having an alternative sexuality, like to be catered to. queer asexuals should absolutely be part of pride! but asexual groups should be redirecting their aim to something a little less invasive, which includes opting out of using pride as the go-to for visibility. the idea that asexuality's biggest issue, invisibility, can be cured by piggybacking off of an event that is still met with violent police presence and protests is incredibly offensive to everything in me tbh. people are hurt by heteroromantic and aromantic asexual presence because we are not at a place where desexualization can be extricated from the history of forcible sexual oppression of queer people.

the lgbt community absolutely does not have to be inclusive, especially when it comes to heteroromantic and aromantic asexual presence.

(also, "transgender people," please :/)

(no subject) (Anonymous) Expand
(no subject) (Anonymous) Expand
beautifully said!

I'm in Pittsburgh, too! And I think this is a great idea. :D I don't have many answers for you on the wheres and hows, but both my fiance and I are ace and at least passively out about it. I would certainly like to be part of it, and I can't imagine that imitarate would say no.

Good to hear! :) Well at least I know there's people who like the idea... now just how to execute it! Someone out there has to know and come out of the woodwork eventually. And even if a place in the parade doesn't work, maybe the ace folk of Pittsburgh can still try to meet at the parade and just be there and check everything out together, if that still interests everyone. There be options! x)

there are several pittsburgh threads on the aven meetup forum, including what looks like a regular weekly event. i'd think that'd be the best place to ask, and there may be some planning underway already if they're that organized.

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i hardly think talking about how the presence of hetero and aro asexuals might be destructive to pride makes us sjw.

SJWs? Are you serious? Fuck that statement, fuck that whole concept. You have no idea what the hell social justice is actually about.

Besides, I find it VERY amusing that you're posting in an asexual community yet use "social justice" as an insult.

Call it whatever you want- this whole thread was about the idea of having an asexual group at a pride parade. You know, something that we, as aces, DO NOT BELONG TO. You really expect people to say "sure, join us! Even though we didn't invite you, even though you didn't ask us, even though you keep ignoring us when we say we don't think this is a good idea." Yeah... not gonna happen.

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